This video circulated through my Facebook & Twitter newsfeeds twice last month. It is powerful, to be sure.  I watched it a handful of times back to back. I cried.  I shared it.

(For reference, Sam was 8lbs when he was BORN, and at one and a half years old, weighs 25lbs.)

“The pure joy that will come from a rescue and a ransom of a child’s life is probably the most satisfying thing you can imagine. [George Dennehy]“

The video made me overwhelmingly THANKFUL for how many personal friends I have that are smack dab in the middle of adoptions – right now.  I’m not sure how I got to be friends with such amazing people – I really lucked out in that department.

*My friend, Brandy is bringing home Nora from the DR Congo.  Nora is only 4 days older than Brandy’s biological daughter, Grace, so, God willing, this time next month, Brandy will have “twins.”

*My friend, Susan, also known as “The Greatest Pediatric Physical Therapist Ever” (she taught Madeline to sit, stand, and walk), is waiting to bring home Yulia, a 14-year-old from Ukraine.  After a disappointing delay in the adoption process, she felt it was because God was asking more.  She is now waiting to bring home not one, but three teenagers from the Ukraine.

*My friend, Christie, is bringing home a baby girl due in April.  She found out about the opportunity three weeks ago.  With huge faith and courage she opened her heart and home and said “yes” to the process.  She was chosen by the birth mother this week.  Radical obedience.

*My friend Joe and his family are purposefully seeking to adopt a baby with special needs.  Joe and his wife are not just anti-abortion; they are pro-life.  They (like all adoptive families) are paying a huge sum of money to live out their conviction that every life has value, and to show mothers of unplanned and unwanted pregnancies that there are families willing to raise and love children of all levels of ability.  They already have three young biological children, one of whom has special needs.

Seriously, how is it that I’ve come to know such beautiful, compassionate, generous people?

I’ve not been quiet about how my heart beats for adoption.  Now is not the time for my family; I say this with prayer and peace.  But because it’s a real conviction and passion, I can’t just push the pause button on action.  I try every day not to settle with being “touched,” but to allow myself to be moved.

“Self-deception slithers in when we mistake appreciation for application or being touched with being changed.” [Beth Moore]

If you are certain that adoption is not for your family, or if you’re like me, and it’s just not for your family now, you can still be moved by and for the orphans of the world.  Here are the stories of my four friends, interview style; I’m hoping that they move you like they’ve moved me.

Brandy and Noah

Who are you adopting or seeking to adopt?

Lord-willing, we are adopting lovely Nora Divine from the DR Congo. Although she is now 16 months old, we still refer to her as our “baby” Nora. Apparently she has an enamoring personality since we’ve already been contacted by 4 adoptive families asking if we’ll send pictures and updates to their daughters who miss playing with their baby Nora from the orphanage. Nora is only 4 days older than our biological baby girl, Grace. We tell Grace about her “twin” sister all the time and she can now proudly point to Nora’s picture and say “Sissy.”

 How far along are you in the adoption process?

We have endured almost 3 years in our adoption process, which has felt particularly long since we were originally told the Congo program would only take 6-9 months. Praise God, our next step is actually the last step! We’re fundraising for our travel expenses now, and are tentatively planning to go to the Congo this month to bring our little one home! We are only waiting on her visa, which could be issued any day now, and then we’re approved for travel!

Why did your family choose to adopt?

My husband and I were first drawn to adopt through the influence of our close friends who adopted a son and daughter from Ethiopia three years ago. We were able to walk with them through the entire process and were extremely affected by the profound significance of their adoption as it relates to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Previously, we had regarded adoption as a wonderful “second chance” for couples struggling with infertility, but through our friends, we were humbled and amazed to learn the beauty of the Gospel as it is revealed through adoption.

My husband and I were so touched by this connection between the Gospel and adoption that we couldn’t help but want to be a part of it with our own family. James 1:27 became more than just words on a page as we were challenged to critically consider God’s call in our own lives.

When we were desiring to start a family, we chose to pursue adoption right away rather than looking at it as an option “down the road.” The Congo is the poorest country in the world where 20% of children die before their 5^th birthday. It’s also the “rape capital of the world” where if you’re a woman, you know you’re likely to be a victim. Those statistics and the fact that we met the qualifications for this country made us choose the Congo and international adoption.

It was special to find out afterwards that Noah’s late grandfather had always prayed for the Congo and even intended to be a missionary there at one point. Although he never made it there, his prayers for the Congolese will likely have impacted little Nora Divine’s life forever as she will soon become a part of our family.

In the end, we chose to adopt because we’re so grateful God chose to adopt us! We are eager to love and care for our sweet Nora Divine and we love all the ways God has showed His special intention in placing her with our family. For example: Nora and Grace being “twins,” or how Nora’s birthday was the date I had hoped Grace would be born on – 9/10/11 (the coolest birthday ever), and even that Nora’s given name is “Divine” and she is truly our divine gift! After the months and years of waiting, we are still so happy we chose to adopt and can’t wait to really begin this adoption journey once we bring her home!

Brandy and Noah’s Fundraising site (and more pictures of Nora Divine) is here.

 

Susan and Jerry

Who are you adopting or seeking to adopt?

We are adopting three teenagers from Ukraine: Yulia is 14, Iryna is also 14 and her brother Oleg is 12.

(The three Ukrainian kids and Susan and Jerry’s three biological children at Christmas.)

 How far along are you in the adoption process?

We have completed our home study and sent our 600A form to USCIS. We are awaiting approval from the US government to adopt internationally, and in the meantime, finalizing our dossier to be submitted to Ukraine as soon as our approval comes in.  Also, we are aggressively fundraising.  All expenses are paid to date out of our own pockets, but we have $15,000 due to submit the dossier and then travel expenses to raise.  Our journey began last April, but we didn’t actually begin official adoption proceedings until August 2012.

Why did your family choose to adopt?

This whole thing began with an organization called ProjectOneFortyThree that sponsors the hosting programs in Latvia and Ukraine twice a year; in the summer and at Christmas. Once we were approved, we selected a child, (what I mean is I God selected our child…that soon became obvious) and she came to live with us for seven weeks in June 2012.  Her name was Yulia, she was 14, and she was OURS! We knew it from the moment we saw her.  You see, we had been asked of our intentions upon applying as a host family (host only, adopt or undecided) and we were certainly open to adopting, but were not going into this with the intent to adopt.  That was over the second we saw her smile!

All too soon, the day came to put her back on the airplane to return to Ukraine.  We all cried…for days! It was one of the worst days of my life.  In our grief, we were fueled to begin the adoption process so that we could bring her home permanently.  We were working diligently with the home study, but it soon became apparent that there was no way we would get our Yulia home before Christmas, and therefore decided to re-host.  This was an expense that we really could not afford, but there was no WAY my baby was going to spend Christmas in that orphanage.  She had lived there for eight years of her life and as long as I had breath in my body, she would spend as little time there as I had the ability to control!

Strangely, however, there was unrest in my heart.  We were supposed to do something else, but I didn’t know what. I shared with Jerry and the kids my struggle, and that I felt God was telling me that there were other children that needed us.  Once again, everyone in the family agreed and looking at the “kids needing hosting” list, we found not one, but two kids, a sibling set, who resided at the same orphanage Yulia did. Along came Iryna and Oleg Petryk, ages 14 and 12.  This time we only had the three kids for four weeks, but in that time, we knew this was our new family and we knew why our home study had been delayed.  If our home study had been completed on time, it would have only been approved for us to adopt one child.  Now we could “tweak” it and have it written for three!

Susan and Jerry’s story and fundraising site is here.

 

Christie and Q

Who are you adopting or seeking to adopt?

We have been chosen to adopt a newborn baby girl from Florida due on April 6!

 How far along are you in the adoption process?

We just found out about this situation three weeks ago and were just chosen by the birth parents this week. So, we are currently in the process of updating our home study and fundraising!

Why did your family choose to adopt?

We started our adoption journey 3 years ago and were blessed with our little girl, Moriah.  We were then presented with the opportunity to adopt her biological brother this time last year.  We were heartbroken when his adoption failed (their birth parents chose to keep him at birth).  We had written off ever adopting again and were trying for biological children when this current situation arose.  Two weeks ago I was getting ready to head out the door when I received a message from a fellow adoptive Mom that said, “I have a birth family that’s looking for a married, Christian, inter-racial couple, with only adopted children for a baby girl due April 6.”  Say what!  Why don’t you just add, “And their names are Christie and Q!”  Because of the criteria the birth family was looking for, we couldn’t say no!  So, we were obedient to what we felt the Lord was asking us to do and here we are….trusting and believing!

Christie and Q’s story/blog is here.
Their current fundraising campaign is here.

 

Joe and Hannah

 

Who are you adopting or seeking to adopt?

We are seeking out a child with special needs. We clearly have a heart for individuals with special needs seeing as we already have a child with Down Syndrome. I can’t fathom the notion of anyone passing up on a Benji! What a blessing he has been. When we met with our adoption counselor for the first time, she confirmed our intentions by telling us that Special Needs adoptions are one of the biggest needs. We were told that Joe and I would be with only a handful of other adoptive parents on the registry willing to adopt Special Need Infants.

Where are you in the adoption process?

Fundraising and waiting!  We are home study approved for a domestic adoption (Within the US – we did not do an international home study and therefore, are ineligible to adopt overseas – at least for this adoption! Who knows, maybe we’ll adopt again in the future!).  We are looking to get a family lawyer and working on procuring an adoption loan for $20,000!!!! (WOW!!!!) We are hoping to raise at least part of this. Definitely a faith journey!

We believe every life has value and that those with special needs are a valuable and wanted part of the community. If there is no one to care for these babies, how would a mother be persuaded to choose life for her child? We want to show the world that “Benji’s” are worth fighting for! They are worth loving. They are worth sacrificing for.

Joe and Hannah’s blog and story is here.  (There is a link to their PayPal account on the site.)

___________________________________________

I’m so thankful for people like Brandy, Susan, Christie, and Joe (and Kelly and Jamie…) who know that the widows and orphans and impoverished and suffering in the world are not someone else’s responsibility.  I’m thankful for people who do not shy away from the command and the call, even when it sounds radical and difficult and costly.  Would you consider helping me help them bring their babies home?  Will you be more than touched, will you be moved?

 

“Far too often I hear, “If people can’t afford what it costs to adopt, they shouldn’t adopt.”  We were crushed one time by a person very close to us who said, “How come when YOU hear from God it costs ME money?”  Usually I am too hurt to respond with adequate words.  I saw this from my very smart friend on Facebook and had to share, ‘When a family seeks help in raising funds for an adoption, it’s not like asking people to pitch in toward a new boat, or help pay for a vacation. What they are doing is committing to heal, with God’s help, a child who has suffered the profound damage of being unwanted and unloved. They are obediently living out the command given in James 1:27 to care for the orphan, clothing the gospel of Christ’s redemption in flesh and blood and now. When they ask for the body of Christ to come alongside them financially and prayerfully, they are giving us the opportunity to be a part of the miracles God works through obedience.’”  [Via Christie's Facebook this week]

 

Amen and amen.

I was at the doctor’s office last week trying to convince someone with a prescription pad to give me some decent meds.  My usual pharmaceuticals are too strong for le bébé (due to the lame and sorry ears of which I’ve previously lamented) and therefore totally out of the question.

While I was in the waiting room, I had the most enormous surge of affection for my mother-in-law that I’ve ever had, ever.  (And that’s saying something because she watches my kids so that I don’t have to be institutionalized, and also, she gave me the keurig.)

As I was sitting there, awkwardly trying to cross my legs, in complete denial that my belly is now FAR too big to attempt to keep my legs closed no matter how skilled of a contortionist I may be, an elderly woman got out her cell phone and made a call.

She called her law office.  I know this because the volume on her phone was so loud that I could clearly hear the clerk on the other end of the line.

The only thing more awkward than listening to her renegotiate her will, offer her son’s full legal name, disclose personal financial information, and discuss her real estate properties loudly and in front of everyone was what happened next.

As soon as the elderly lady hung up the phone, a second woman whipped around in her chair and said,

“There is not one single part of your brain that told you how completely inappropriate it was for you to have that conversation here in front of all these people, huh!”

Oh boy.

1. There was no good way for the elderly lady to respond to this.  It was a statement, not a question.
2. The mean woman didn’t move to sit next to the elderly lady.  She didn’t whisper, pull her aside, or mention it on her way out the door.
3. The mean woman did not speak out of concern for the elderly lady.
4. The mean woman was loud, huffy, superior, snide, accusatory, and…well…mean.

The only thing more awkward than being present for this confrontation was when the elderly lady said,

“I’m sorry, I can’t hear you sweetie.  I guess everyone in here is so stuffed up with colds, hee hee hee.  What did you say now, sweetie?”

At which point the mean woman repeated herself and followed up with a completely ridiculous rant about how she was going home to steal the elderly woman’s identity to make a point.

The only thing more awkward than that was when the elderly lady, still giggling, TOOK A POLL OF THE WAITING ROOM.  (The common sense.  Where has it gone?)

“Was anyone else here bothered by the conversation I just had?  Hee hee hee.”

I thought, “Surely, surely, there is not a third person in this waiting room crazy enough to get involved.”

Oh, Kate, how you underestimate the stupidity of humans.  And the number of crazies in middle Georgia.  After all, Honey Boo Boo’s interview house is less than a mile from my doctor’s office so maybe none of this should surprise me.

A third woman piped up and said, “Well, this was neither the time or place…”

I will spare you the play by play.

The point is, I sat there for fifteen minutes listening to three total strangers squabble and peck at each other in the doctor’s office.

As I watched this little social experiment unfolding I thought to myself,

“Hold the phone, that lady is somebody’s MOTHER-IN-LAW.”

That belligerent woman who WOULD NOT DROP IT is somebody’s mother-in-law.

And that is how it came to pass that on a Thursday morning, sitting in the doctor’s office, I had the most enormous surge of affection for my dear, sweet, mother-in-law, who would never chastise another person publicly in a waiting room.

It also occurred to me, as I sat there, how much of the world’s ugliness would be cured if we all just learned when to keep our mouths shut.

“A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered.  Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.”  [Proverbs 17: 27-28]

 

Day 4 of Kate’s Live Second journey. Sign up to follow as Kate and 14 other bloggers dare to Live Second for 60-Days-of-Second. Start your own journey and get the Live Second book in stores December 9.

I have an addiction. Like all addictions, it’s ugly.  When I write it you’re going to make some judgments about me, no matter how hard you try not to.  No matter how hard you try to remember that we all have our baggage and that Christ died to save me, when I say,

“I am addicted to having and wanting expensive things,”

some presumptions are going to force their way into your minds.

You might presume that I grew up in privilege, and in a sense, you’d be right.  I’ve learned that “privilege” is enormously subjective, but I’ve also learned that the suburb in north Raleigh where I grew up places me in the very upper echelon of global society.  Maybe even American society.

I got a car when I turned 16, and my parents paid for it.  When I crashed it the following year I got another car.  I traveled a lot; I went to France on an exchange trip when I was in the 7th grade and to the Bahamas for a family wedding when I was in the 11th.  I had nice prom dresses that I didn’t pay for, and, while I still have a sizeable student loan, my parents paid for three-quarters of my private 4-year college education.  This was absolutely the norm in the community where I grew up.  My family was not wealthier than my friends’ families – in fact, we had a lot less than some of them.

I’ve never struggled with anger, alcohol, unhealthy relationships, substance abuse, gossip, or eating disorders, but I struggle against materialism and consumerism still.

After five years in full-time ministry.  After five over-seas mission trips which exposed me to third-world poverty.  Three years after God gave me an enormous burden for cross-cultural missions.  After three years of moving towards minimalism, three years of deliberately increasing my giving.  After years of living meagerly on one income with 2 kids (and one on the way), it’s lurking under there – in my sinful parts like a dark, dirty cancer.

A.W. Tozer wrote this about sin, specifically materialism and greed:

“The ancient curse will not go out painlessly; the tough old miser within us will not lie down and die obedient to our command. He must be torn out of our heart like a plant from the soil; he must be extracted in agony and blood like a tooth from the jaw. He must be expelled from our soul by violence as Christ expelled the money changers from the temple.”

This is true of all sin, and it is at once terribly depressing and wonderfully encouraging.

It’s depressing because it hurts.  It’s depressing because it’s exhausting.  It’s depressing because we don’t ever get to stop fighting.  It’s depressing because we might never stop wanting whatever terrible thing it is that we want.  (What is it for you?)

But it’s wonderful because we are not alone.  This addiction, this struggle, this desire that will. not. go. away. is what Paul was talking about when he wrote, “I do not understand what I do.  For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”

It’s wonderful because Paul is a pillar of the Christian faith; he wrote 13 books of the Bible.  He served God so fearlessly and faithfully that when we read accounts of his life and faith he almost sounds superhuman.  It’s wonderful because, as Doug writes in Live Second, “The mark of a follower of Jesus, of one who lives Second, is not perfection (though that will come in the end); it is the fight, the struggle to turn the tides of our desires toward the Maker of our souls.”

I recently wrote a post about how much I LOVE living in a teeny, tiny house – how it is one of my new favorite things.  There are a lot of surprising, magical reasons, but upon further reflection, I think one I didn’t list in my post was that it keeps me fighting.  It’s not a bloody, battle-weary kind of fighting; it’s a peaceful, joyful, falling-in-love-with-my-cozy-home kind of fighting.  The tiny house forces me to do that which I know I SHOULD BE DOING anyway, and they payoff for the fight is nothing short of miraculous.  Deep, abiding contentment.  I love this little home more than any other place we’ve ever lived.

I’m at peace today, despite my dirty little longing for fancy clothes and a new car.  I have peace because God is huge and vast and omnipotent and His selflessness and generosity in me is enough to conquer the selfishness hiding there a million times over.

His forgiveness is complete, perfect, enough (for my addiction, and for yours).
He’s on my side.  He’s for me.  He’s with me (and you).
He’s my shield and my sword and my portion in the fight.  And His grace is sufficient, Hallelujah.

_____________________________________________

Read Live Second, Day 1 here.
Read Live Second, Day 2 here.
Read Live Second, Day 3 here.

Day 3 of Kate’s Live Second journey. Sign up to follow as Kate and 14 other bloggers dare to Live Second for 60-Days-of-Second. Start your own journey and get the Live Second book in stores December 9.

I’ve found that the physical world and the spiritual world are inextricably combined.

I like to imagine that they were stirred up in a big pot in heaven before they were poured out in creation.  I imagine that God poured in a bottle of tangible things and a bottle of intangible things, and as they swirled together in the big cosmic mixing pot, all the atoms combined to become molecules – and there is no separating them.  Now our every-day, physical lives are infused with divine significance – there is no “my life on earth” and “my spiritual journey;” there’s just life, everything included.

There is no biblical mention of a giant, cosmic mixing pot, but the picture makes me smile.

So on the fourth day, as I read through Live Second, I got physical.

I read this.

(I’m not the most diligent underliner, so sue me.)

“Sin shall not be your master.”  The cool thing is, technically, sin IS NOT your master.  Christ freed you, that’s what the resurrection was all about, you just need to stop taking sin’s orders anyway.

Too often we (I) live like those poor circus elephants who are chained to a stake in the ground to keep them from running off.  As babies, they tug and pull on their chain, but can’t pull up the stake, so one day – they just stop trying.  Then they grow into massive, intelligent creatures who could uproot two dozen stakes in the ground – but they don’t.  Because they’re broken in.

If some sin has mastery over you, it’s not because you can’t be free; it’s because your mind is broken in.  Our sinful nature says, “Do this,” and instead of questioning its authority, we just concede like lemmings.

So this is what I did this week:  I said, out loud, to my sinful nature who was barking orders at me to feel sorry for myself and whine and eat some more,

“No.  I do not take orders from you any more.”

It was only me and the kids in the house at the time, but I plan to keep telling my sin nature to shove it, so if you hear rumors about me and schizophrenia, you can ignore them.  You can say, “No, she doesn’t hear voices, she’s just talking to her sin nature.”  Not that that sounds any less crazy.

But I’m tired of living like a broken-in circus elephant, and I bet you are too.  It’s not the life we were created for.

Saying “No” out loud solidifies our resolve.  It makes it final, a decision.

The physical act of speaking matters.  I think that the reason a lot of people don’t pray is because they’ve never talked to God out loud before – they’ve never tried the words out on their tongue.  The reason some people don’t budge during worship is that they’ve never lifted a hand before, nobody ever made them try.  Walking down to the alter feels ENORMOUS because it’s wholly unfamiliar.

Physicality matters.

I think it’s important to tell children, “pray after me,” and lead them phrase by phrase through a prayer.  I think it’s important for a worship leader to ask a congregation to lift their hands with palms facing out – to express exaltation of God, and for us to try praying on our knees to express desperate need and submission.

Some people say that these kinds of corporate actions are rote – empty and ritualistic.

Hogwash. 

It’s leading.  It’s teaching.  It’s discipling new believers and equipping them with spiritual practices that will help them draw near to God.

This week, as I was challenged through Romans and Live Second to stop enslaving myself to sin, I’ve  been intentional to infuse the physical into this spiritual struggle.  I encourage you to do the same.

Form the words with your mouth and say them.

“No, sin, I don’t take orders from you any more.  I am not too (tired, hungry, turned on, depressed, angry, entitled, insecure, sad) to stop.  I do not answer to you.   I have a new master.  A better master.  He is loving and joy-giving and life-orchestrating, Hallelujah, and I take orders from Him now.”

Make those words so familiar that they become your gut reaction, your first-responder-reaction to temptation.  Pray so consistently every morning that you start doing it even as you hit the snooze button.  Praying half-asleep doesn’t mean that it’s insincere, it means that it is INSIDE OF YOU.

And that’s the secret: that’s how you start living with a new nature, how you start living as a free creature instead of a chained one – you get the truth inside of you.

_________________________________________________

Read Live Second, Day 1 here.
Read Live Second, Day 2 here.

Dear Reader-Friends,

I am writing you this virtual letter because I don’t go to the post-office ever.  Also I don’t have your addresses or any spare time.  Also there are a lot of you.  But I wanted to tell you how excited I am for this week of blogging.  My friend from college wrote a book.  It’s a really good book, and you might have heard of it.   It was so good that he wrote a second book, Live Second: 365 Ways to Make Jesus First, which debuts today.  I had the privilege of reading it ahead of time so that I could share my experience with you this week.  For the next 4 days I’ll be posting here (and on the I Am Second blog) about the week I read (and worked) through the section on “Struggles.” (Intense.)

That’s what’s up!  I hope you enjoy my stories.

love,
Me

Day 1 of Kate’s Live Second journey. Sign up to follow as Kate and 14 other bloggers dare to Live Second for 60-Days-of-Second. Start your own journey and get the Live Second book in stores December 9.

You want to know what’s really cool about snagging the Live Second week on “Struggles?”  You open up your book and see this.

 

Then you watch the video.  And sweet mother, if you have not watched the video, go do it right now.

You want to know what’s really NOT cool about snagging the Live Second week on “Struggles?”  You might actually have to confront your struggles.  Publicly.  On the internet.

My experience with Live Second began with this powerful video and a powerful story packed with powerful truths.  But hidden in the account of all of that mountain-moving power (read it here) is an ugly, condemning reality.

We, as a race, are so married to our comfort zones and status quos that we would forfeit divine healing if it meant we got to keep our worlds exactly as we know them.

We would deny another man healing from the litany of demons that torment him because, to be honest, it’s weird for God to work that way – to go around healing crazy people, rearranging demons, and sending massive herds of pigs into lakes.  Surely there’s a way to bring peace and harmony to the world without making such a scene.

We think, “I’m not sure I want healing in these here parts if healing involves drowning 2,000 pig demons.”

Or, to bring it home, “I’m not sure I want healing if healing means I have to confess – out loud to another person – my addiction.  If it means the humiliation of another person knowing my thoughts and my selfish motivations.  If it means actually feeling sorry and not just saying it.  If it means discipline.  I don’t know if I want healing all that badly if it means I have to live second.”

But that’s the condition.  It always has been.  Jesus says, “Here’s the deal.  You give me all your ugly, and I will destroy it and give you all my beauty in its place.  Give me your weariness and I’ll give you my rest.  Give me your sin and I’ll give you my purity.  Give me your selfishness and I’ll give you my compassion.  Give me your anger and I’ll give you my grace.”

Christianity is an upside down, inside out way of being.  It bucks against everything in our nature, against every instinct of self-preservation.  Christianity says lose yourself; yourself is messed up.  Take Christ instead.  Jesus can deliver from legions of demons, but it will look illogical and upside down.  It will look like living second in a world that thinks second is foolish.

I’m wary of using a metaphor here, because it’s clear that Jesus delivered this man from literal demons (and delivers us still), but it is significant that this demon’s name was Legion, because there were many.  I suspect that you are like me.  I suspect that you don’t need deliverance from one demon, you need deliverance from many.

Oh, I don’t know: consumerism, materialism, self-pity, vanity, selfishness, pride, unbelief, lust, discontentment, greed, gluttony, laziness, unforgiveness, fear…  You know, just off the top of my head.

The beautiful, liberating, powerful truth is this: that whole daunting legion of demons cowers before Christ’s mercy.  He is able to deliver from each of them – from all of them.  The problem is, we tend to say, “Jesus, come into my life! I need you! Welcome to my inmost being!  I’m just going to have to ask that you not move anything around in here.”

Or at least, that’s what I’ve said to God this week.

God: Confess your attitudes and thoughts to your husband.
Me: I can’t.  He’ll think it’s all my fault…

God:  Let me work in your heart during church.
Me: But they’ll see me crying.  I’m still too new here; they don’t love me enough yet.  I’m a pastor’s wife.  I can’t…

God:  Ask your friend for forgiveness.
Me: It’s water under the bridge, from too long ago.  I can’t.

All week I’ve whimpered, “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t.”
And all week God gently whispered back, 

“Kate, so that you may be healed.”

Sweet, sweet healing; it’s all any of us really want.  I hate my struggles, my demons.  They are suffocating and oppressive and they peck away at the best parts of me.  And so, the most significant moment in my Live Second journey was this:  

It was the moment Jesus, merciful Jesus, ready and able to deliver me from all of my wretched demons, lovingly asked me,

Why are you holding on so tightly to something you hate so much?

My challenge to you this week is this:  Don’t be those townspeople.  I’m sure they weren’t bad people; they were probably really normal and sensible.  But don’t be embarrassed for Jesus; don’t be afraid to let him heal you.  Don’t be afraid to believe that he can heal the people around you from demons – serious demons, like meth addiction.

Don’t be so off-put by how it looks that you forfeit the only thing that will make your life right again.

Jesus is merciful.  Jesus is able.  He is faithful to heal and redeem the ugliest, most scarred and oppressed bits of your life.  He will turn everything upside down in doing so -

but you should let Him.

Two years ago, I wrote a devotional for each day of the Advent season, searching for and celebrating Hope, Peace, Joy, and Love.  I’m posting the links here as a resource, in case you’d like to have a quick thought to read every morning, every evening, or just every-so-often.

Enjoy, and Merry Christmas!

Advent: what and why?

Week 1: Hope
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

Week 2: Peace
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

Week 3: Joy
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

Week 4: Love
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

(That’s a lot of writing.  It was a busy winter.)

I am a Christian.  That’s not exactly been a secret around here, I’m just throwing it out in case you’re new.

But here’s the thing this time of year:  I don’t much care if you’re a “Happy Holidays” person or a “Merry Christmas” person.

If people want me to tell them “Happy Holidays,” I’ll tell them “Happy Holidays.”  It doesn’t make a lick of difference to me.  I celebrate Christmas either way.

I have a big giant soapbox here, which I’ll spare you – mostly.

Suffice to say I’m a big proponent of the separation of Church and State.  I don’t think that insisting that “America” (the government, the institution) be Christian is nearly as important (or effective) as insisting that the American church does it’s job – that Christians in America share Jesus with people.

Nowhere in the Bible (or in the Constitution) does the word “Christmas” appear, and Jesus never asks anyone to celebrate his birthday.  Now – I’m glad we do, because it’s significant and history-changing and beautiful and it means that He came for us – and I’d hate for us to miss an opportunity to tout that.  But say we lived in a place where the culture didn’t get its panties in a wad about Santa vs. no Santa or Christmas vs. Holidays – a place like, oh, most other places in the world.

I doubt we’d spend our time lobbying for “Merry Christmas” to be printed on the greeting cards.  We’d probably celebrate Christmas as Christians and try to live out our faith in word and deed.  After all, nobody was ever sued or litigated into heaven.

I said I’d spare you the soapbox.  This is me intentionally cutting off this train of thought.  Are you proud of me?  You should be.  I have a lot more to say.  This rabbit hole goes for miles.  But I’m stopping, really.  Look.

…

…

There is, however, one Christmas v. Holiday battle that I will fight.  I’m talking guerrilla warfare if it comes to that.

Music.

Imagine with me, if you will, a world in which all the songs that celebrate the love of God and the birth of Jesus were stricken from the record and from HALLOWEEN TO NEW YEARS the only songs we could catch on the radio, in stores, at the symphony, and at every parade and festival were songs like “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.”

HECK. NO.

Two full months of “Jingle Bells,” “Santa Claus is Coming to Town,” “The 12 Days of Christmas,” and “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer????”

My ears are bleeding just thinking about it.

There are some great holiday songs, to be sure, but I can only listen to so many renditions of “The Christmas Song” and “Let it Snow.” I don’t care if you are Sarah McLachlan, eventually it’s all just nails on a chalkboard.

I need the beauty. 
I need the depth, passion, and sacred holiness of “Silent Night,” “O Holy Night,” “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen,” “Joy to the World,” “Hark, The Herald Angels Sing,” “O Come All Ye Faithful,” “The First Noel,” “Away In A Manger,” and “Angels We Have Heard On High.”

We absolutely cannot get rid of “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear,” “We Three Kings,” “O Little Town of Bethlehem,” and “O Come, O Come Emmanuel.”

There is no holiday song that can scratch the surface of the preciousness of,

“Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Til He appeared and the soul felt it’s worth.
A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices!
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn!”

I don’t give a flip if you send me holiday cards.  I won’t bat my eyelashes for a second at your holiday tree, your holiday vacation, your holiday meal, or your holiday-anything-else.  But please, please, please don’t leave us all with holiday music.

Artists, don’t let the pressure get to you.  Sing to us about the beauty of the rich tradition of Jesus.

We can not have 60 days of “Santa Baby.”  WE CAN. NOT. HAVE IT.

________________________________

(Listen to my new favorite Christmas music here, and enjoy a free download for kateelizabethconner.com readers!  You’ll love it!)

(If you did not read that title in the voice of Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof, please go back and read it correctly.)

This is a love letter to ancient religion.

Last week, we started our church service by reciting the Jewish Shema.  That’s all it took to reduce me to tears.

It wasn’t the words I was speaking (though I believe them with enormous joy and conviction) that evoked an emotional response, but the act of speaking them.

The physical act of forming the words that so many other believers have formed before me, feeling them on my lips.  33 words that have launched a thousand prayer services and affirmed the faith of millions.  As I spoke, I felt connected to the church – the body of Christ – in deep, solid, tangible way, as if we were all holding onto the same thick, heavy rope that runs through time.

I love the rich, ancient tradition of Christianity.  I love old hymns, written prayers, the apostle’s creed, responsive readings, and prayer positions.

There is beauty in the depth of the Christian faith.  The gospel is simple, because God’s not hiding, but the story – the whole story – is layered and nuanced and complex.  It is epic.

The story of God is like all the best stories: it is most beautiful when it’s complete.  Sure there are pretty parts, meaningful parts, and you don’t have to know the whole story to get the gist, but the more you dig in, the more likely you are to catch the foreshadowing, the allusions, and the symbolism.  Everything is illuminated by everything else, and, when you start catching glimpses of “the big picture,” it thrills you.

“Oh, so THAT’S why they call Him ‘the Lamb.’”

“Oh, so THAT’S why the tabernacle was such a big deal.”

“Oh, so THAT’S why we say ‘Hosanna.’”

“Christian-ese” is a cheeky term for words that “church people” use that “not-really-church-people” think are weird.  Words like: repent, Trinity, sanctification, born again, walking in the flesh, and living by the Spirit.  I don’t use a lot of Christian-ese because, while theology is hugely important, there’s a way to talk about it without making it sound cult-ish to people that didn’t grow up in Sunday School.  (It’s the same reason I choose not to get lost in circular theological debates.  Nowhere in Scripture do I see Jesus caring about those things, instead I see him condemning them.  An overly-academic or argumentative discussion of things “Christian” is a trap.  For believers: a distraction to keep us occupied in our self-involved circles, and for non-believers: a turn-off, because if that’s what Christianity is, well, ain’t nobody got time fo’ dat.

But this is a love letter.

Just because Christianity has a jargon of sorts, and just because there can be a bit of a learning curve, doesn’t mean that it’s not worth learning – eventually.

“Amen” is more powerful when you know in your heart that it is an expression of agreement and expectant faith – that it can be translated as “So be it!”  (“Oh, so THAT’S why we say ‘Amen’ after prayers, and sing it at the end of the Doxology, and shout it when somebody says something our souls agree with.  ’Yes!  So be it!’”)

On Sunday, after we recited the Shema, we sang a song that contained the phrase “the veil was torn.”

I love that, because I happen to know those parts of the story (what the veil is, why it was there in the first place, and what would have happened to someone who tried to sneak behind it), I know what that seemingly cryptic phrase means.

I know that the torn veil speaks of God’s desire to be close to me; it speaks of the intimacy I can have with Him.  It means that I don’t need a translator, an ambassador, or an intermediary to go to God on my behalf.  It means He hears me when I pray.  It speaks to Jesus’s authority; it means that His work on the cross was complete.  It means that the forgiveness He offers is complete.

I love that I can sing the phrase “the veil was torn” and all of that wells up in my heart and I am moved by the power and the love of God.  I don’t need a sermon; I just need a phrase.

Just because something is ancient doesn’t mean it’s obsolete.  Sometimes it means that this ancient thing has stood the test of time; that it is enduring and perpetually relevant because it cuts to the quick of what it means to be human.  I believe that Christianity (not the songs we sing, or the hot-button social issues, or the soapboxes, but the Bible and Jesus) is this kind of enduring, perpetually relevant, ancient thing.  It connects with us on a level so deep that it doesn’t change with the centuries or the cultures.

If the thought of ancient religion makes your eyes roll or your stomach churn, I challenge you:  press in a little deeper to the ancient tradition of Christianity.  Not the empty orthodoxy or the religious dogmatism, but something really significant and enduring.  Try fasting, or memorizing a little piece of scripture, or praying in a new worship posture.

I promise, it won’t be long before you feel like you’ve picked up that steady, heavy rope of faith –  and that it is guiding you, grounding you, and connecting you to the great cloud of witnesses who’ve gone before – leading your right into the presence of God.